Wednesday, June 27, 2012

Why Teddy Roosevelt was the Coolest President Ever and Why FDR Sucked in Comparison

Why Teddy Roosevelt Rocks My Socks:
He was a sickly child, but Teddikins (my affectionate nickname for the greatest guy ever) went on to do so many things.

  • He was born in October. Which is, like, my second-favorite month. So, right there, he was a pretty schnazzy fellow. Then, he was born in New York, which is my favorite state ever. So, by sheer due date and location of entry, Teddyursa is pretty well-off.
  • He's the second child. Number two.
  • At age seven, he saw a dead seal at the market. Instead of being traumatized, sickly little Teds-Boggins became fascinated in zoology. He even asked for-- and got-- the seal head. Then, he learned about taxidermy so he could kill and stuff his own animals. 
  • At age nine, he wrote a paper about bugs. Just because he could. What a little perdy-nerdy Teds-McGuffin was.
  • He had a photographic memory. He could dictate two separate things to two secretaries at the same time and flip through a new book. If that isn't smart, I don't know what is.
  • He had a serious heart problem and the doctors said he should get a quiet desk job. But Teedie didn't. He chose a very strenuous life.
  • His wife and mom died on the same day. Teddy never spoke of either death. He kept a diary. The entry that day was, "X The light has gone out of my life."
  • Three outlaws stole his riverboat. Teddy hunted them down. But, instead of killing them, took them to a trial. He guarded them for forty hours, reading to keep himself awake. 
  • He married a woman named Kermit. And had a son named Kermit.
  • He's the only US President to be awarded the Medal of Honor. 
  • When McKinley died, Teddy kept his ways. He didn't replace them with his own. It was like McKinley was still in office. Except he was dead. And Teddy was there. And, let's face it, Teddy was way cool. Why?
  • McKinley died from a gunshot. Teddy was shot and, without seeking medical attention, gave a speech. Why? Because he figured that, since he wasn't coughing up blood, he would be okay and hadn't been gravely wounded by a gunshot to the chest.
  • His speech was ninety minutes long. He began it by saying, "Ladies and gentlemen, I don't know whether you fully understand that I have just been shot; but it takes more than that to kill a Bull Moose."
  • He was an avid hunter. He killed everything. His house is actually kind of creepy. But still really cool. He has everything in there!
  • The Boy Scouts named him Chief Scout Citizen.
  • He led the Rough Riders.
  • He dug through a country. Laterally, of course, but still. He commissioned the Panama Canal and was there for the entire thing.
  • "The old lion is dead." was the announcement his son Archie sent out after Teddy died of a heart attack.
  • He boxed, even though he was blind in one eye, due to a boxing accident.
  • "Tread softly and carry a big stick."
  • He kept a badger as a pet. The badger was named Josiah.
Now, why FDR sucks in comparison.
He was a sickly child. But, instead of growing up to pwn the whole world, he got defeated by mud. That's it.

Monday, June 25, 2012

Thinspo

There's this new "craze" going around called Thinspiration, or Thinspo. As you can probably tell from the name, it's inspiration for becoming thin. They give you healthy eating and weight-loss tips. However, much of what I've seen, is borderline anorexic.
And not the, "Oh, she's thin. Let me put her down by commenting on her weight" anorexic. Actual anorexia nervosa. They say a picture is worth a thousand words. Here's a quick definition:
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This is not healthy. This is not weight loss for health. This is pro-ana (pro-anorexia). This is terrifying and a plague upon both our houses. (Sorry, I needed to quote Shakespeare..) But, seriously, it's terrifying. Because there are girls and boys who read this stuff, believe it, and then repeat it.
Now, I have no problem with weight loss. I even pin some things. Because they're healthy for you. It's just saying, "Hey, want to lose a pound? Here, just burn x more calories than you eat." or "Here's some healthy foods that boost your metabolism." None of it encourages people not to eat. It's sick.
The average US woman is 5'4". At 5'4", a woman should weigh 124-138 pounds. A whopping 33 pound difference. The average newborn is 7.5 pounds. So, basically, the thinspo woman can carry four newborns and be at the low range for average weight.
I know that everybody is a different shape and size. I know that a "healthy weight" is different for everybody. I have a friend who's naturally tall and thin. Another who's short and thin. I'm short and dense. I know people who are tall and dense. The point is, people should be encouraged to get to a weight that's healthy for them. So, no. Taking somebody that's healthy at 130 and telling them that they should be at 100 isn't healthy. 
And guess who thinks like that? Who thinks that a perfectly average, healthy weight is fat? And who doesn't eat? And who prides themself on not eating? Anorexics. That is a common denominator of anorexics. A fear of food. Or a loathing of food. Or a fear of becoming "fat."
Now, a question for the girls who pin and blog and "tumble" Thinspo because it's "attractive." Do you think that constantly being cold is sexy? How about mottled, sallow, greyish skin? Fatigue? Constantly being sick? Hair loss? Are those sexy? Because those are common side effects of anorexia. As is death.
And the tips for how to hide not eating. (That isn't even thinspo now. That's purely pro-ana.) That's disturbing. That is a mental illness. It's not to be prized and praised. Not to be shown to the world. It's horrible. You're, essentially, hurting yourself and those around you, so you can be "pretty enough." Stop. It isn't healthy. If you really want to lose weight, there are healthy ways to do so. Seek those out. Go to your local gym. Or just research. But, please, stop this. It's messed up.

Now, for some videos:

I feel like I've poorly phrased this entire thing. That I'm attacking people. That I'm just scaring them. That I haven't gotten my point across. But I'm hoping these videos made somebody somewhere think and act upon their thinking. And not pro-thinspo. Anti-thinspo. Fitness and health and exercise and balanced diets are healthy. Losing weight is normal. Pushing your body to the extreme and bullying yourself and not eating are terrible and dangerous. Those behaviors aren't normal. Especially if you feel like you have to hide it.

Wednesday, June 20, 2012

The REAL Answer to Life, the Universe, and Everything

Ben and I have recently gotten into an argument over the meaning of everything. He, quite wrongly, believes that it is "42." In fact, many people seem to believe that the answer is "42." But they are wrong. The real meaning of the universe is 2. And I can support this theory entirely.

Reason 1) Two is the Optimus Prime. It's the first prime, and the ONLY even prime. It's the very first. Without two, the basis of most of our numbers would die. So, really, any number higher than two. Watch:
Simple Counting: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5... But, without two, we wouldn't get any higher than 1. Well, we'd get to 1.9999999999...99999...999999999...999998 (Because 1.9............ is two)
Multiplication: Anything that ends in 0, 2, 4, 6, or 8 is automatically up a creek. Because, how do you get 10 by multiplying only whole numbers? 5*2. So, no 2, no 10.
Those are just two reasons why 2 is wholly important in numbers. Also, 2 and 3 are the only consecutive prime numbers. Two is one of very few numbers whose answer is the same, whether you square, add, or multiply it by itself. 2^2=4; 2+2=4; 2*2=4. Pretty schnazzy, huh? The first known irrational number? The square root of two.

Reason 2) I would not be able to write this, and you would not be able to read this, without 2. Because technology is based off of the binary system. The binary system? It's based off of two.

Reason 3) Living things are based off of two. (Well, normal things. Things we see every day. Things using DNA.) Forrealzies. Because how many strands does a DNA double helix possess? Two. How many base pairs are there? Two. How many things make up those base pairs? Two. Also, as humans, we normally possess two of everything. Two arms/legs/eyes/nostrils/tonsils/ears/hands/feet/sides of the brain/etc. Maybe we were designed with symmetry in mind. But guess what gives perfect symmetry every time? Two. (Well, the option of perfect symmetry.)

Reason 4) You can not make 42 without 2. The numbers for 42? 4 (2*2) and 2 (2). The bases? 21*2. 21 {[(2+2+2+2+2)*2]+[2/2]} and 2 (2).

So, really, Douglas Adams, you lied to everybody. And I expect a formal apology and a retraction of your incorrect statement. And I want you to recant. Because you just got served!

Update: Douglas Adams is dead. He's been dead for 11 years now. Sorry, dude. You can rest in peace. But your successors had better apologize. Because you were wrong. But don't worry. The world as we know it would not be in place without misinformed beings. Galileo, Newton, Einstein (apparently), Aristotle, lots of famous people have been wrong. But nobody holds grudges against them. So I won't hold one against you. Maybe you'll become like Galileo. World-renowned for being wrong. And I'll be right. And all will be at peace. But, if you would like to apologize, please just comment down below or shoot me a quick email.

Monday, June 18, 2012

High School

IS A BIG, FAT LIE!


Well, not high school, so much, as the media. They make it seem like such a gorgeous, lovely place that has gorgeous, lovely people. All through my childhood, I couldn't wait to get to high school. I thought that I'd instantly be cool and that the world would not be able to contain my awesomeness. That was all a lie. (In all honesty, little me was weird. I thought I'd be married with kids by sixteen, and was excited to have braces..) I thought that it would be a big, fantastic wonderland. 
It's all a lie.


My high school expectations:
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Reality is kind of sucking. I thought I'd have a car. I'm petrified of getting my license. I thought I'd be popular. I have a select few friends, and I only see one outside of school. Yeah, enjoy middle school while you can. High school sucks.

Friday, June 15, 2012

Style Inspiration

Hey, guys! I think we've all realized by now that I'm a terrible blog owner. Seriously, though, if this blog was a kitten or small child, it would be dead. But that's a terrible thing to say. So I'm going to stop with my neglected blog and just get on with things. Because apologizing doesn't do anything for anybody.

I really like seeing other people's outfits and their style inspirations. It's fun and gives me a lot of inspiration for my outfits. So let's hope I can rub off on y'all!

1.  Studded jeans/shorts. They're just so cool and excellently bad@$$. But there's something oddly feminine about them. However, I would love to make my own.
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2. Ear cuffs. They're just amazing and wonderful and I just love jewelry that takes up everything. Full-finger rings, huge stacks of bracelets, ear cuffs. They're just so cool!
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3. Teeny rings. They're just so gosh darn adorable!
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4. A studded jacket or a spiked jacket. Kind of like Gaga's "Born This Way" jacket
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5. Red plaid pants. Or, really, red plaid anything.
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6. Awesome bags. I really want a backpack, actually. I love huge bags. And bags I can put my ridiculous key chain on and fill with pins.
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That's all I'm giving you guys for now! If you want to see more of my style, check out my Pinterest board! Hope you liked it!

Saturday, June 9, 2012

List 10 Things You Would Tell Your Sixteen-Year-Old Self

I'm way too close to sixteen to be able to correct myself. So, I'm going to change it to just younger me in general.


  1. Skunking your hair is a terrible idea and you never should have done it. Ever.
  2. That relationship? Yeah. It's horrible. Don't stay in it. He's a jerk to you and doesn't respect you. And you really need to stop putting up with his bull.
  3. That other relationship? Yeah. It isn't the end of the world. You'll move on. And you can do much better. Just stop being so pathetic. He isn't going to take you back. Ever.
  4. Stop being such a shrew. Nobody's impressed. You're eight and not that cool. So get over yourself. Please. 
  5. Don't even bother with her. You're only going to be friends until she finds somebody more popular to hang out with. Everything will then become your fault. Just leave it be.
  6. Stop that. So what if she started it? So what if she went after him? Just leave her alone. You two used to be best friends. Get over it. He's just a boy.
  7. Math does. not. suck! You've hated it since second grade. But, don't worry. Seventh grade will change everything. And not just your view on math.
  8. Eighth grade is the end. You won't stay best friends with anybody. You'll still be friends, of course. But you will never get those relationships back.
  9. Stop dressing like that just to please him. He doesn't love you more for it. If he says he does, he obviously doesn't respect you enough to be with you. Girls hate you for it and pity you. Nobody takes you seriously. Forreal, put some clothes on. You'll meet Ben in jeans and a tshirt. He'll fall in love with you in jeans and a tshirt. For nine months, he will only ever see you in jeans and a tshirt, and he won't care. So cover up a little more.
  10. Stop acting like that. It's pathetic. You're smart, show it. People like you for you, and they like you for how smart you are. Don't ever change yourself or lose yourself for some guy.
Now! Ten things for future me. Maybe a to-do list. Maybe just for-the-heck-of-it. Maybe to look back and laugh at my naive child-self.

  1. Get tattoos. 
  2. Get piercings.
  3. Move to New York.
  4. Dye your hair crazy colors.
  5. Visit Europe.
  6. Take crazy classes in college. Just because.
  7. Drive a full-size van. Preferably a Volkswagen van, but a 1988 Chevy Explorer will do.
I can't think of 10 things right now. However, I'll work on it.

Friday, June 8, 2012

Biggest Fears

I came across this girl on YouTube who is doing a "Vlog a Day June." And, since it is June, I want to join in. But I'm blogging instead. Because I'm a terrible and neglectful blog owner.
So, Day 1 was "20 Facts," but there are a lot of facts about me here, so I'm going to skip that. Day 2 is "Your Biggest Fears."

I'm afraid of a lot of things. Actually, I'm afraid of very little. But many things make me nervous or anxious. However, I will only share three today, since that's the assignment. (Note: The word "assignment" makes me feel like a spy.)

Fear número uno: Getting old. Actually, not so much getting old, but becoming incapable. I don't mind aging. It's a natural process. However, I never want to lose control of my body or my mind. That thought terrifies me. I never, ever, ever want to get to the point of basically becoming a vegetable and a burden on my family. Because, along with this fear, I'm terrified of them no longer wanting me and dumping me in a nursing home so they can live without hassle. That thought just freaks me out. I never, ever want to be without my family.

Fear numéro deux: Zombies. They absolutely terrify me. To the point where I have lost sleep over that. I'm actually afraid of the dark because of my fear of zombies. Multiple times, actually, I've called Ben crying because it's dark. (He's amazing. He always answers the phone and talks to me until I fall asleep.) What doesn't help? All of these super-publicized cannibal attacks, that everybody's relating to the zombie apocalypse. That freaks me out. The poor man in Miami that had his face eaten? Yeah. When I heard that story, I almost started crying and panicking.

Fear numero tre: Go-Karts. I hate being in go-karts. They scare me, since I hurt my friend with one due to my inability to find the brake. I can't even be in one now, much less drive one. My mom took me in one a couple of months after my friend-wounding go-kart incident. I was just sitting next to her, holding our purses. I was clutching them for dear life and refused to move. It got so bad that she kept asking me what was wrong. Yeah. I'm not a friend of go-karts.

Sunday, June 3, 2012

Travels

Hey, guys! I'm back from a too-long absence. School's out so I'll have a lot more time to blog, which is nice. However, I don't know exactly what to blog about. So, if you guys could help, that'd be lovely. Now onto the real post.


I love traveling. (Which is funny because I absolutely suck at geography. Like, I didn't know where Delaware was. Even worse? I didn't know that it was a state!) There are so many places I would love to travel to, mostly in Europe. Actually, all but one is in Europe.
I think it'd be fun to go to South America and Mexico, but those places aren't very safe for Americans. Same with parts of Asia and Eastern Europe. I'm sure they're very nice places (if they weren't, I doubt many people would visit there) but my nationality is a large hindrance.
However, this isn't a post about my fortunate/unfortunate global placement. This is a post about where I want to travel. So, in no particular order, here we go.

1. Manhattan, New York. It is my favorite place on the entire face of the earth. I love that city. It's just so busy and bright and fast and full. Like, you never get bored in New York. Honestly, I would love to live there, even if it's only for a little while. It's such a magical city.
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2. Milan, Italy. I really just want to explore all of Italy. It seems like such a romantic country. Plus, it would be nice to see where my family comes from. But I mostly just want to visit Italy for Italy.
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3. Florence, Italy. Again, it's Italy and a famous Italian city. 
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4. Venice, Italy. I don't think it's possible to go to Italy and not see Venice. I'd be willing to say that it's probably the second-most famous Italian city there is. (Rome is first, of course. Fun fact: I didn't know that Rome was part of Italy until sixth grade.)
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5. Athens, Greece. We're hopping off the Italian train for a little bit. But don't worry, we're still staying in the Mediterranean. Greece is so full of history and beauty, I'd just love to see it. (Fun fact: The Parthenon directly correlates with the Fibonacci spiral. Another fun fact: I don't know if this is the Parthenon or not. I sure hope so!)
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6. Barcelona, Spain. I just really want to see it. It looks so romantic and graceful and old. I can't really explain why I want to see these places. I just do!
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7. Rome, Italy. Choo choo! Italy Express is back on the tracks! Haha but just for a second. Rome is the most famous Italian city (in my mind) and I would just love to see it.
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8. London, England. It's London. It just is. It explains itself. LONDON!
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9. Paris, France. Everybody says that Parisians are snobby. But their city is darling.
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10. Munich, Germany. It just looks so nice and I want to visit all of the famous European countries/cities. Well, the "safe" ones.
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Now, by all means, this isn't every city I want to visit. Just a small handful, a select few. Almost like a preview to my world travels.