Saturday, June 9, 2012

List 10 Things You Would Tell Your Sixteen-Year-Old Self

I'm way too close to sixteen to be able to correct myself. So, I'm going to change it to just younger me in general.

  1. Skunking your hair is a terrible idea and you never should have done it. Ever.
  2. That relationship? Yeah. It's horrible. Don't stay in it. He's a jerk to you and doesn't respect you. And you really need to stop putting up with his bull.
  3. That other relationship? Yeah. It isn't the end of the world. You'll move on. And you can do much better. Just stop being so pathetic. He isn't going to take you back. Ever.
  4. Stop being such a shrew. Nobody's impressed. You're eight and not that cool. So get over yourself. Please. 
  5. Don't even bother with her. You're only going to be friends until she finds somebody more popular to hang out with. Everything will then become your fault. Just leave it be.
  6. Stop that. So what if she started it? So what if she went after him? Just leave her alone. You two used to be best friends. Get over it. He's just a boy.
  7. Math does. not. suck! You've hated it since second grade. But, don't worry. Seventh grade will change everything. And not just your view on math.
  8. Eighth grade is the end. You won't stay best friends with anybody. You'll still be friends, of course. But you will never get those relationships back.
  9. Stop dressing like that just to please him. He doesn't love you more for it. If he says he does, he obviously doesn't respect you enough to be with you. Girls hate you for it and pity you. Nobody takes you seriously. Forreal, put some clothes on. You'll meet Ben in jeans and a tshirt. He'll fall in love with you in jeans and a tshirt. For nine months, he will only ever see you in jeans and a tshirt, and he won't care. So cover up a little more.
  10. Stop acting like that. It's pathetic. You're smart, show it. People like you for you, and they like you for how smart you are. Don't ever change yourself or lose yourself for some guy.
Now! Ten things for future me. Maybe a to-do list. Maybe just for-the-heck-of-it. Maybe to look back and laugh at my naive child-self.

  1. Get tattoos. 
  2. Get piercings.
  3. Move to New York.
  4. Dye your hair crazy colors.
  5. Visit Europe.
  6. Take crazy classes in college. Just because.
  7. Drive a full-size van. Preferably a Volkswagen van, but a 1988 Chevy Explorer will do.
I can't think of 10 things right now. However, I'll work on it.

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